Dear brother,
Went to visit you at your flat but
you weren’t there, so I had sex
with Lestrade in your kitchen.
I’d rather not tell you exactly
where in the kitchen.
Deduce.- MH
Mycroft,
Obviously the table as one of the legs is now wobbly.
Oh, and as for the office situation me and
John went to your house to apologise. You weren’t
in then either. So I had sex with John whilst wearing your
favourite suit and used your best tie to gag him.
Deduce where i’ve put them.
- SH
LOVE ME JOHN WHY WON’T YOU LOVE ME WHAT DID I DO WRONG WAS IT WHERE I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE ME ALONE OR WHERE I SAID I DON’T HAVE FRIENDS OR WHERE I DRUGGED YOUR COFFEE FOR NO DISCERNIBLE REASON PLEASE LOVE ME WHYYY
I GIVE UP ON LIFE BECAUSE SHERLOCK YOUR FACE!
I’m sorry, what does that paper say?
And a bit closer?
To those of you who can’t read that, looks like it says “Boffin Holmes, accompanied by confirmed bachelor John Watson - refused to comment.”
To those of you who don’t know..
A “confirmed bachelor” is a polite euphemism for a gay man, used on the premise that such a man won’t ever marry.
Basically, canon.IT’S CANON.
IT’S… CANON.
I CA-
ARE YOU SERI-
CONFIRMED BACHELOR
HELP ME
CANCEL ALL MY PLANS.
FUCK SLEEP.
SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK.
SLEEP IS FOR THOSE WHO DARED SUGGEST JOHNLOCK WASN’T CANON.
AND NOW I SHALL LAUGH AT YOU
AH
AH HA
AH HA HA HA
THERE
NOW YOU FEEL STUPID
DON’T YOU
YES YOU DO
YES
#context? what context #they sound like two friends after a drunken one night stand #seriously #read it again
Listen. What I said before John, I meant it. I don’t have friends. I’ve just got one.
Stitched this moment together out of screencaps I took. Not completely perfect but don’t care right now.
I just needed this. Because of reasons.
“sup bros i just got back from harpooning some mermaids nbd”
THANK YOU
Sometimes I think that maybe I ship Sherlock/John too hard.
Then I remember that Sir Arthur Conan Doyle ships Sherlock/John too hard.
- Has Stayin’ Alive by the Bee Gees as his ringtone
- Messes with both of the Holmes brothers
- Sends Mycroft Holmes a text saying ‘Dear Me’ after foiling a plan that’s been in operation for years
- Has dated Molly Hooper
- Blows raspberries at the Big Ben
- Spends millions of pounds on explosives-
Because he’s bored
OH GOD DYING
